Coping mechanisms for Grammarphiles

If you get annoyed by blatant disregard grammar and punctuation rules like I do, the Internet is a bad place for your blood pressure.

Here are some excellent coping mechanisms from a like-minded soul : http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/04/alot-is-better-than-you-at-everything.html

This is a good one:

When someone types out “u” instead of “you,” instead of getting mad, I imagine them having only one finger on each hand and then their actions seem reasonable.  If I only had one finger on each hand, I’d leave out unnecessary letters too!

hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com

Thanks, Allie. I’ll keep this in mind for next time.

And I love the ALOT too!

The Alot is an imaginary creature that I made up to help me deal with my compulsive need to correct other people’s grammar.  It kind of looks like a cross between a bear, a yak and a pug, and it has provided hours of entertainment for me in a situation where I’d normally be left feeling angry and disillusioned with the world.

hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com

P/S: I know there’s a whole other camp who absolutely detests it when people make words – like “Grammarphiles” – up. Or, I’m thinking, it could be a subset of the same camp of obsessive compulsive folks. Well, too bad for them.

Poor imitation of a Talkshow

I haven’t caught local TV for awhile. The boyfriend and I decided to give it a chance on Sunday night, as it looked from the trailers that there are some new and interesting programmes coming round the block, but the standard is absolutely appalling! I was so irked at wasting half an hour of my life that I had the impetus to write in to MediaCorp (well, they asked for feedback):

I watched the premier telecast of ‘Singapore Talking’ on Sunday.

While the topic was promising (and being in the same boat as the concerned individuals who are currently priced out of the property market, very close to my heart), it was an extremely poorly executed imitation of a talk show.

From the programme’s start, the host Ashraf Safdar looked like he was in a rush to be somewhere else. He was constantly interrupting the guests speakers just as they started making some headway into the discussion. There were many instances where he posed a question to either one of the speakers and they are barely a few words into the sentence when he has anticipated (or assumes he has anticipated) what they are going to say and cuts them off.

He obviously had certain discussion points to put across, ensure he incorporates pseudo-interactive elements like call ins and e-mails and keep to the timing for commercial breaks, which resulted in abrupt changes to the topic or suddenly entertaining (literally in mid-sentence) calls and e-mails that touched on completely separate tangents.

Watch the recording again, and it will be glaringly clear that Ashraf’s head was hardly even in the discussion; he was probably more concerned about what point he is going to cover next.

Perhaps giving pointers to the presenter are a necessity in case the discussion tapers off, but the producers need to realize that in such talk shows, the insights oftentimes come from the participants themselves. The host merely plays a role of facilitating the interaction, probing and incisive questioning for greater depth.

Unfortunately, in this case, the host was obstructing the discussion rather than facilitating. I feel sorry for the guests (two “industry experts” and a “man on the street”); they may have had some interesting perspectives, but were hardly ever allowed to speak.

Maybe, in a typically Singaporean manner, the producers were much too afraid (read : kiasi) to allow interaction and debate to flow naturally, an essential pre-requisite for such a format. Otherwise, why bother having studio guests come in in the first place? If one wanted full control, you might just as well have featured the host in a 20-minute soliloquy on the topic.

The show promised interesting debate and provoke thought, but hardly even scratched the surface of such a passionate issue for many Singaporeans. Reading someone’s random blog post might have been more enlightening, and you probably could get more “discussion” from the comment thread.

In the end, ‘Singapore Talking’ falls prey to the same trap of the issues it wishes to address – too dictated and controlled allow room for creativity.

Baby talk

Sometimes I wonder if I am completely devoid of any maternal instinct.

It’s baby season, and photographs of newborns (as well as slideshows and videos – we do live in the digital age, you know) have been headlining my Facebook. In recent months, I think close to ten people I know just delivered. And while all normal females have been ahhing and oohing at the pictures, I really cannot bring myself to do any gawking.

So I say “Congratulations” – because I am sincerely happy that the mothers (and fathers) are so happy and proud – and “I love her name” – because sometimes I really do.

And because I cannot say, “I don’t see how your baby looks different from any other scrunched up ball covered in gunk, and honestly, all the drool and spit is a little disgusting.”

The Cynic in me thinks it could all just be socialization : our exposure to shows like ER and Anne Gedes photography from an early age makes us think appropriate behavior is for us to think that babies are the most adorable creatures.

Or maybe babies fall into the “love is blind” category : somehow, only the parents honestly think they are beautiful. And the rest of us are just hypocrites.

The Idealist in me thinks maybe one day I will understand. (This is what I thought since I was 12; nope, no change here yet.)

Okay, so I know that babies are like God’s gift to the world and everything, and I don’t mean to sound ungrateful. But honestly, in a competition of “cuteness”, any other baby animal in this kingdom God created will win hands down any day. I mean, who can not melt at the sight of a puppy?

That said, however, I am indeed more partial to little ones after they grow some hair, sit up, learn a few words and preferably start walking. So when I start commenting about how cute your toddler or kid is, I actually think so.

Still, those who know me know I’d much rather get a Golden Retriever.

In the interest of curiousity satisfaction, I Googled “I hate babies” and actually got 64.6 million hits!

In comparison, “I hate puppies” only got 1.7 million hits.

‘Nuff said.

Talk about vicious cycle

Lookie here, what’s all this with the iTunes store not operating in Singapore?

Sure, they have some pseudo-store that sells obscure games like “Tap Tap Revenge III” (don’t ask), but apparently not much else.

Makes sense : we’re Asian and so we’re all Pirates and have no respect for any property that’s intellectual.

Take a look at my proud shelves of DVDs. My principle not to watch anything “not original” stems from four and a half years of toiling in the Media and a misplaced conviction that my watching of Veronica Mars in its pretty box-set is contributing to the betterment of the TV industry (and saving a Production Assistant from starvation).

You can be sure I would have gladly paid the US$1.29 for Kris Allen’s new single.

Only that I am sent around in circles to find out that song – and any other thing worthwhile (i.e. the music) – is not available in my location! Would I like to buy “Tap Tap Revenge”* instead?

(Ok, so it not all that shocking, considering I’ve done the same thing since I got my first iPod in 2003. But every few months I like to try my luck, hoping that maybe the good people at Apple finally came to their senses. Before, we had no store all! I can’t figure out which is worse though – having no store or the sad imitation of one we’ve got now.)

Easy for a more savvy person to turn to Kazaa or whatever is the “in” thing that has not been shut down nowadays.

Sorry, Kris.

* I must disclaim that I didn’t actually buy this game, so it may be a really good game for all I know, but you get my drift.

Pet peeve.

A Feel Good Read: Chicken Soup For The Singapore Soul

As of January last year, the ‘Chicken Soup for the Soul’ series has spawned over 165 titles from Chicken Soup for the Mother’s Soul to Chicken Soup for the Prisoner’s Soul to Chicken Soup for the Ocean Lover’s Soul. So perhaps it was only a matter of time before this republic made it to the list making it the first Asian country to have its own Chicken Soup title. Featuring contributors like Ambassador-At-Large at the Ministry of Foreign Affairs Tommy Koh, Singapore’s No. 1 golfer Mardan Mamat and founder of the now defunct One Ninety Nine chain Nanz Chong Komo, Chicken Soup for the Singapore Soul is a collection of fluid stories that are comforting and inspirational in a distinctly local fashion. We brew some hot soup in The Living Room with contributors Nanz Chong, Dr Tan Thiam Chye, Jimmy Yap and editor Leong Ching

—————

Ain’t it supposed to read “Chicken Soup for the Singaporean’s Soul”?

And to think it’s proudly printed on the cover of the book and displayed islandwide. So many contributors and editors and nobody noticed the grammatical incorrectness (irony intended) of it?!

ARGH.

Weirdos FC.

Did I mention I got harassed that day? (Yes Sarah, this is right after I sent you off at your bus-stop and was walking to mine.)

This is the creepy result:

First this African guy who refused to let me go, kept grabbing my hand, wanted to drag me to Mustafa, and offered to pay for my air tickets to South Africa (which is beautiful of course, but that’s not the point).

Next, a Chinese-speaking Malaysian ah beng who followed me around and wanted to “make friends”.

Fuck off, losers!